Waiting for Godot Read online

  ESTRAGON: Then what are we complaining about?

  VLADIMIR: Thinking is not the worst.

  ESTRAGON: Perhaps not. But at least there’s that.

  VLADIMIR: That what?

  ESTRAGON: That’s the idea, let’s ask each other questions.

  VLADIMIR: What do you mean, at least there’s that?

  ESTRAGON: That much less misery.

  VLADIMIR: True.

  ESTRAGON: Well? If we gave thanks for our mercies?

  VLADIMIR: What is terrible is to have thought.

  ESTRAGON: But did that ever happen to us?

  VLADIMIR: Where are all these corpses from?

  ESTRAGON: These skeletons.

  VLADIMIR: Tell me that.

  ESTRAGON: True.

  VLADIMIR: We must have thought a little.

  ESTRAGON: At the very beginning.

  VLADIMIR: A charnel-house! A charnel-house!

  ESTRAGON: You don’t have to look.

  VLADIMIR: You can’t help looking.

  ESTRAGON: True.

  VLADIMIR: Try as one may.

  ESTRAGON: I beg your pardon?

  VLADIMIR: Try as one may.

  ESTRAGON: We should turn resolutely towards Nature.

  VLADIMIR: We’ve tried that.

  ESTRAGON: True.

  VLADIMIR: Oh it’s not the worst, I know.

  ESTRAGON: What?

  VLADIMIR: To have thought.

  ESTRAGON: Obviously.

  VLADIMIR: But we could have done without it.

  ESTRAGON: Que voulez-vous?

  VLADIMIR: I beg your pardon?

  ESTRAGON: Que voulez-vous.

  VLADIMIR: Ah! que voulez-vous. Exactly.

  Silence.

  ESTRAGON: That wasn’t such a bad little canter.

  VLADIMIR: Yes, but now well have to find something else.

  ESTRAGON: Let me see.

  He takes off his hat, concentrates.

  VLADIMIR: Let me see. (He takes off his hat, concentrates.

  Long silence.) Ah!

  They put on their hats, relax.

  ESTRAGON: Well?

  VLADIMIR: What was I saying, we could go on from there.

  ESTRAGON: What were you saying when?

  VLADIMIR: At the very beginning.

  ESTRAGON: The very beginning of WHAT?

  VLADIMIR: This evening . . . I was saying . . . I was saying . . .

  ESTRAGON: I’m not a historian.

  VLADIMIR: Wait . . . we embraced . . . we were happy . . . happy . . . what do we do now that we’re happy . . . go on waiting . . . waiting . . . let me think . . . it’s coming . . . go on waiting . . . now that we’re happy . . . let me see . . . ah! The tree!

  ESTRAGON: The tree?

  VLADIMIR: Do you not remember?

  ESTRAGON: I’m tired.

  VLADIMIR: Look at it.

  They look at the tree.

  ESTRAGON: I see nothing.

  VLADIMIR: But yesterday evening it was all black and bare.

  And now it’s covered with leaves.

  ESTRAGON: Leaves?

  VLADIMIR: In a single night.

  ESTRAGON: It must be the Spring.

  VLADIMIR: But in a single night!

  ESTRAGON: I tell you we weren’t here yesterday. Another of your nightmares.

  VLADIMIR: And where were we yesterday evening according to you?

  ESTRAGON: How would I know? In another compartment.

  There’s no lack of void.

  VLADIMIR: (sure of himself). Good. We weren’t here yesterday evening. Now what did we do yesterday evening?

  ESTRAGON: Do?

  VLADIMIR: Try and remember.

  ESTRAGON: Do . . . I suppose we blathered.

  VLADIMIR: (controlling himself). About what?

  ESTRAGON: Oh . . . this and that I suppose, nothing in particular. (With assurance.) Yes, now I remember, yesterday evening we spent blathering about nothing in particular. That’s been going on now for half a century.

  VLADIMIR: You don’t remember any fact, any circumstance?

  ESTRAGON: (weary). Don’t torment me, Didi.

  VLADIMIR: The sun. The moon. Do you not remember?

  ESTRAGON: They must have been there, as usual.

  VLADIMIR: You didn’t notice anything out of the ordinary?

  ESTRAGON: Alas!

  VLADIMIR: And Pozzo? And Lucky?

  ESTRAGON: Pozzo?

  VLADIMIR: The bones.

  ESTRAGON: They were like fishbones.

  VLADIMIR: It was Pozzo gave them to you.

  ESTRAGON: I don’t know.

  VLADIMIR: And the kick.

  ESTRAGON: That’s right, someone gave me a kick.

  VLADIMIR: It was Lucky gave it to you.

  ESTRAGON: And all that was yesterday?

  VLADIMIR: Show your leg.

  ESTRAGON: Which?

  VLADIMIR: Both. Pull up your trousers. (Estragon gives a leg to Vladimir, staggers. Vladimir takes the leg. They stagger.) Pull up your trousers.

  ESTRAGON: I can’t.

  Vladimir pulls up the trousers, looks at the leg, lets it go. Estragon almost falls.

  VLADIMIR: The other. (Estragon gives the same leg.) The other, pig! (Estragon gives the other leg. Triumphantly.) There’s the wound! Beginning to fester!

  ESTRAGON: And what about it?

  VLADIMIR: (letting go the leg). Where are your boots?

  ESTRAGON: I must have thrown them away.

  VLADIMIR: When?

  ESTRAGON: I don’t know.

  VLADIMIR: Why?

  ESTRAGON: (exasperated). I don’t know why I don’t know!

  VLADIMIR: No, I mean why did you throw them away?

  ESTRAGON: (exasperated). Because they were hurting me!

  VLADIMIR: (triumphantly, pointing to the boots). There they are! (Estragon looks at the boots.) At the very spot where you left them yesterday!

  Estragon goes towards the boots, inspects them closely.

  ESTRAGON: They’re not mine.

  VLADIMIR: (stupefied). Not yours!

  ESTRAGON: Mine were black. These are brown.

  VLADIMIR: You’re sure yours were black?

  ESTRAGON: Well they were a kind of gray.

  VLADIMIR: And these are brown. Show.

  ESTRAGON: (picking up a boot). Well they’re a kind of green.

  VLADIMIR: Show. (Estragon hands him the boot. Vladimir inspects it, throws it down angrily.) Well of all the—

  ESTRAGON: You see, all that’s a lot of bloody—

  VLADIMIR: Ah! I see what it is. Yes, I see what’s happened.

  ESTRAGON: All that’s a lot of bloody—

  VLADIMIR: It’s elementary. Someone came and took yours and left you his.

  ESTRAGON: Why?

  VLADIMIR: His were too tight for him, so he took yours.

  ESTRAGON: But mine were too tight

  VLADIMIR: For you. Not for him.

  ESTRAGON: (having tried in vain to work it out). I’m tired!

  (Pause.) Let’s go.

  VLADIMIR: We can’t.

  ESTRAGON: Why not?

  VLADIMIR: We’re waiting for Godot.

  ESTRAGON: Ah! (Pause. Despairing.) What’ll we do, what’ll we do!

  VLADIMIR: There’s nothing we can do.

  ESTRAGON: But I can’t go on like this!

  VLADIMIR: Would you like a radish?

  ESTRAGON: Is that all there is?

  VLADIMIR: There are radishes and turnips.

  ESTRAGON: Are there no carrots?

  VLADIMIR: No. Anyway you overdo it with your carrots.

  ESTRAGON: Then give me a radish. (Vladimir fumbles in his pockets, finds nothing but turnips, finally brings out a radish and hands it to Estragon who examines it, sniffs it.) It’s black!

  VLADIMIR: It’s a radish.

  ESTRAGON: I only like the pink ones, you know that!

  VLADIMIR: Then you don’t want it?

  ESTRAGON: I only like the pink ones!


  VLADIMIR: Then give it back to me.

  Estragon gives it back.

  ESTRAGON: I’ll go and get a carrot.

  He does not move.

  VLADIMIR: This is becoming really insignificant.

  ESTRAGON: Not enough.

  Silence.

  VLADIMIR: What about trying them.

  ESTRAGON: I’ve tried everything.

  VLADIMIR: No, I mean the boots.

  ESTRAGON: Would that be a good thing?

  VLADIMIR: It’d pass the time. (Estragon hesitates.) I assure you, it’d be an occupation.

  ESTRAGON: A relaxation.

  VLADIMIR: A recreation.

  ESTRAGON: A relaxation.

  VLADIMIR: Try.

  ESTRAGON: You’ll help me?

  VLADIMIR: I will of course.

  ESTRAGON: We don’t manage too badly, eh Didi, between the two of us?

  VLADIMIR: Yes yes. Come on, we’ll try the left first.

  ESTRAGON: We always find something, eh Didi, to give us the impression we exist?

  VLADIMIR: (impatiently). Yes yes, we’re magicians. But let us persevere in what we have resolved, before we forget. (He picks up a boot.) Come on, give me your foot. (Estragon raises his foot.) The other, hog! (Estragon raises the other foot.) Higher! (Wreathed together they stagger about the stage. Vladimir succeeds finally in getting on the boot.) Try and walk. (Estragon walks.) Well?

  ESTRAGON: It fits.

  VLADIMIR: (taking string from his pocket). We’ll try and lace it.

  ESTRAGON: (vehemently). No no, no laces, no laces!

  VLADIMIR: You’ll be sorry. Let’s try the other. (As before.)

  Well?

  ESTRAGON: (grudgingly). It fits too.

  VLADIMIR: They don’t hurt you?

  ESTRAGON: Not yet.

  VLADIMIR: Then you can keep them.

  ESTRAGON: They’re too big.

  VLADIMIR: Perhaps you’ll have socks some day.

  ESTRAGON: True.

  VLADIMIR: Then you’ll keep them?

  ESTRAGON: That’s enough about these boots.

  VLADIMIR: Yes, but—

  ESTRAGON: (violently). Enough! (Silence.) I suppose I might as well sit down.

  He looks for a place to sit down, then goes and sits down on the mound.

  VLADIMIR: That’s where you were sitting yesterday evening.

  ESTRAGON: If I could only sleep.

  VLADIMIR: Yesterday you slept.

  ESTRAGON: I’ll try.

  He resumes his foetal posture, his head between his knees.

  VLADIMIR: Wait. (He goes over and sits down beside Estragon and begins to sing in a loud voice.)

  Bye bye bye bye

  Bye bye—

  ESTRAGON: (looking up angrily). Not so loud!

  VLADIMIR: (softly). Bye bye bye bye

  Bye bye bye bye

  Bye bye bye bye

  Bye bye . . .

  Estragon sleeps. Vladimir gets up softly, takes off his coat and lays it across Estragon’s shoulders, then starts walking up and down, swinging his arms to keep himself warm. Estragon wakes with a start, jumps up, casts about wildly. Vladimir runs to him, puts his arms round him.) There . . . there . . . Didi is there . . . don’t be afraid . . .

  ESTRAGON: Ah!

  VLADIMIR: There . . . there . . . it’s all over.

  ESTRAGON: I was falling—

  VLADIMIR: It’s all over, it’s all over.

  ESTRAGON: I was on top of a—

  VLADIMIR: Don’t tell me! Come, we’ll walk it off.

  He takes Estragon by the arm and walks him up and down until Estragon refuses to go any further.

  ESTRAGON: That’s enough. I’m tired.

  VLADIMIR: You’d rather be stuck there doing nothing?

  ESTRAGON: Yes.

  VLADIMIR: Please yourself.

  He releases Estragon, picks up his coat and puts it on.

  ESTRAGON: Let’s go.

  VLADIMIR: We can’t.

  ESTRAGON: Why not?

  VLADIMIR: We’re waiting for Godot.

  ESTRAGON: Ah! (Vladimir walks up and down.) Can you not stay still?

  VLADIMIR: I’m cold.

  ESTRAGON: We came too soon.

  VLADIMIR: It’s always at nightfall.

  ESTRAGON: But night doesn’t fall.

  VLADIMIR: It’ll fall all of a sudden, like yesterday.

  ESTRAGON: Then it’ll be night.

  VLADIMIR: And we can go.

  ESTRAGON: Then it’ll be day again. (Pause. Despairing.)

  What’ll we do, what’ll we do!

  VLADIMIR: (halting, violently). Will you stop whining! I’ve had about my bellyful of your lamentations!

  ESTRAGON: I’m going.

  VLADIMIR: (seeing Lucky’s hat). Well!

  ESTRAGON: Farewell.

  VLADIMIR: Lucky’s hat. (He goes towards it.) I’ve been here an hour and never saw it. (Very pleased.) Fine!

  ESTRAGON: You’ll never see me again.

  VLADIMIR: I knew it was the right place. Now our troubles are over. (He picks up the hat, contemplates it, straightens it.) Must have been a very fine hat. (He puts it on in place of his own which he hands to Estragon.) Here.

  ESTRAGON: What?

  VLADIMIR: Hold that.

  Estragon takes Vladimir’s hat. Vladimir adjusts Lucky’s hat on his head. Estragon puts on Vladimir’s hat in place of his own which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir takes Estragon’s hat. Estragon adjusts Vladimir’s hat on his head. Vladimir puts on Estragon’s hat in place of Lucky’s which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes Lucky’s hat. Vladimir adjusts Estragon’s hat on his head. Estragon puts on Lucky’s hat in place of Vladimir’s which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir takes his hat. Estragon adjusts Lucky’s hat on his head. Vladimir puts on his hat in place of Estragon’s which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes his hat. Vladimir adjusts his hat on his head. Estragon puts on his hat in place of Lucky’s which he hands to Vladimir. Vladimir takes Lucky’s hat. Estragon adjusts his hat on his head. Vladimir puts on Lucky’s hat in place of his own which he hands to Estragon. Estragon takes Vladimir’s hat. Vladimir adjusts Lucky’s hat on his head. Estragon hands Vladimir’s hat back to Vladimir who takes it and hands it back to Estragon who takes it and hands it back to Vladimir who takes it and throws it down.

  How does it fit me?

  ESTRAGON: How would I know?

  VLADIMIR: No, but how do I look in it?

  He turns his head coquettishly to and fro, minces like a mannequin.

  ESTRAGON: Hideous.

  VLADIMIR: Yes, but not more so than usual?

  ESTRAGON: Neither more nor less.

  VLADIMIR: Then I can keep it. Mine irked me. (Pause.) How shall I say? (Pause.) It itched me.

  He takes off Lucky’s hat, peers into it, shakes it, knocks on the crown, puts it on again.

  ESTRAGON: I’m going.

  Silence.

  VLADIMIR: Will you not play?

  ESTRAGON: Play at what?

  VLADIMIR: We could play at Pozzo and Lucky.

  ESTRAGON: Never heard of it.

  VLADIMIR: I’ll do Lucky, you do Pozzo. (He imitates Lucky sagging under the weight of his baggage. Estragon looks at him with stupefaction.)

  Go on.

  ESTRAGON: What am I to do?

  VLADIMIR: Curse me!

  ESTRAGON: (after reflection). Naughty!

  VLADIMIR: Stronger!

  ESTRAGON: Gonococcus! Spirochete!

  Vladimir sways back and forth, doubled in two.

  VLADIMIR: Tell me to think.

  ESTRAGON: What?

  VLADIMIR: Say, Think, pig!

  ESTRAGON: Think, pig!

  Silence.

  VLADIMIR: I can’t!

  ESTRAGON: That’s enough of that.

  VLADIMIR: Tell me to dance.

  ESTRAGON: I’m going.

  VLADIMIR: Dance, hog! (He writhes. Exit Estragon left, precipitately.) I can’t! (He looks up, misses Estragon.) Gogo! (He mo
ves wildly about the stage. Enter Estragon left, panting. He hastens towards Vladimir, falls into his arms.) There you are again at last!

  ESTRAGON: I’m accursed!

  VLADIMIR: Where were you? I thought you were gone for ever.

  ESTRAGON: They’re coming!

  VLADIMIR: Who?

  ESTRAGON: I don’t know.

  VLADIMIR: How many?

  ESTRAGON: I don’t know.

  VLADIMIR: (triumphantly). It’s Godot! At last! Gogo! It’s

  Godot! We’re saved! Let’s go and meet him! (He drags Estragon towards the wings. Estragon resists, pulls himself free, exit right.) Gogo! Come back! (Vladimir runs to extreme left, scans the horizon. Enter Estragon right, he hastens towards Vladimir, falls into his arms.) There you are again again!

  ESTRAGON: I’m in hell!

  VLADIMIR: Where were you?

  ESTRAGON: They’re coming there too!

  VLADIMIR: We’re surrounded! (Estragon makes a rush towards back.) Imbecile! There’s no way out there. (He takes Estragon by the arm and drags him towards front. Gesture towards front.) There! Not a soul in sight! Off you go! Quick! (He pushes Estragon towards auditorium. Estragon recoils in horror.) You won’t? (He contemplates auditorium.) Well I can understand that. Wait till I see. (He reflects.) Your only hope left is to disappear.

  ESTRAGON: Where?

  VLADIMIR: Behind the tree. (Estragon hesitates.) Quick!

  Behind the tree. (Estragon goes and crouches

  behind the tree, realizes he is not hidden, comes out from behind the tree.) Decidedly this tree will not have been the slightest use to us.

  ESTRAGON: (calmer). I lost my head. Forgive me. It won’t happen again. Tell me what to do.

  VLADIMIR: There’s nothing to do.

  ESTRAGON: You go and stand there. (He draws Vladimir to extreme right and places him with his back to the stage.) There, don’t move, and watch out. (Vladimir scans horizon, screening his eyes with his hand. Estragon runs and takes up same position extreme left. They turn their heads and look at each other.) Back to back like in the good old days. (They continue to look at each other for a moment, then resume their watch. Long silence.) Do you see anything coming?

  VLADIMIR: (turning his head.) What?

  ESTRAGON: (louder). Do you see anything coming?

  VLADIMIR: No.

  ESTRAGON: Nor I.

  They resume their watch. Silence.

  VLADIMIR: You must have had a vision.

  ESTRAGON: (turning his head). What?

  VLADIMIR: (louder). You must have had a vision.

  ESTRAGON: No need to shout!

  They resume their watch. Silence.

  VLADIMIR:

  (turning simultaneously). Do you—

  ESTRAGON:

  VLADIMIR: Oh pardon!